Where O where have you been VBG?

It seems almost unfathomable that it has been more than 3 years since I sat down to organize my thoughts as a shareable experience. It was certainly not for lack of material as there have been some truly definitive milestones but somehow I allowed myself to be seduced by the notion that I no longer had the time nor the talent to run with the big dogs in this socially frenetic landscape. Though the interwebs is indeed a daunting place, my passion as writer and world traveler have again been awakened and so I find myself at Starbucks at 7pm on aThursday evening pecking furiously at something as old and as comforting as my Mama's fried chicken. Yes, I will still be using a lot of food references, it's who I am. In truth, I came here to search for a new job but the serendipity of the book about faces reminding of a post I created some years back in which I proclaimed myself a blogger carried the day. I like to think I'm flexible and wise enough (finally) to embrace signs - the first time.
 
Where to start...the Wunderkind, that Masterpiece of my womb, graduated high school and is blossoming into a lovely young woman. God willing and the creek don't rise, she'll be graduating college next year.  She left this small town that I chose specifically to protect her innocence and where she thrived despite the lack of diversity for the Big city and I believe she's loving life. Yes indeed, she's living like a trust fund baby half the time while I don the role of starving college parent. But it's okay, because I can see the finish line now where I'm certain they'll butcher her name as they hand her that faux college diploma. Even if she graduates Oh Lawd, rather than summa/magna cum laude, that'll still be mission accomplished for me but please, don't tell her. The nest that was our home is now just mine and much, much quieter with her absence save Netflix binges and the purrs of my feline companion, Ella. To be honest, the days in this house are numbered now as she was the sole reason for my moving here. It was well worth the sacrifice but she finds little joy in her hometown now other than the occasional re-acquaintance with old friends or home cooked meal. She won't be coming back here to live and so my time here is done as well. I'm bigger city bound as well.

As someone who has never known the joy of being engaged in a career that was life changing or even rewarding, my primary thoughts since becoming a quinquagenarian (fancy talk for joining the 50 and over crowd) empty-nester have been about getting busy with making the remainder of my earthly time, into a life I enjoy because there TRULY ARE NO MORE EXCUSES now. Since I chose not to join the family business (public sector employment) making any genuine chance of retirement a pipe dream and wasn't wise enough to start saving for retirement at 25, I still desire a career that is satisfying at least 65% of the years I will continue to work. Hopefully the remaining 35% will be vacation time. That vacation time is where I intend to make it matter, through the explicit gratification of my 4 decades of wanderlust which I plan to satisfy over and over again - yes, that's exactly the metaphor I want you to envision because I am truly that passionate about it. And for a change I'm not just wishing or thinking about it, because neither a wish nor a thought are concrete plans.

Number 1 on a November 2012 bucket list post on this blog was to travel to a new locale every year.
The first holiday after I became the parent of a college student was Labor Day 2015 and I decided a reunion with my half-sisters in Miami was in order. I can't swim and share no special fondness for open water but I couldn't get enough of crystal clear waters that kiss the South Beach shore. I could see anything that had the ability to do me harm and allowed myself to truly relax and enjoy being at the beach and in the water for the first time since Jaws. In 2016, I drove to Niagara Falls and Toronto, ON because I could. And I wanted to physcially plant my feet in another country for the first time in well over a decade. While saying it to others probably sounded like hyperbole, I knew it was genuine step to what has been truly been numero uno on my life list...traveling...specifically, visiting the 6 inhabitable continents at least once. Some want letters behind their names, I however desire many, many customs stamps in my passport.
THE ANDES
Argentina was a destination that had been beckoning me for roughly 12 years. In fact, I could not be enticed by anyone else's itinerate journeys despite being super prone to travel envy. Yep, it's a thing.  In fact, I refused to go to anywhere until that notch was in my passport book. So last March, I booked airfare and accommodations for a fall excursion to Buenos Aires...alone. No one I knew what to go but I refused to allow that to stop me. Since it lies below the equator the seasons are opposite ours and as Spring is my favorite, I'd get to experience it twice. By early summer though, it seemed my planning possibly wasn't so fortuitous, we learned my beloved mother was fighting breast cancer again. After undergoing a mastectomy, she would need 4 rounds of chemotherapy at 3 week intervals. Round 3 fell smack dab on my departure date. I had purchased travel insurance and toyed with the idea of cancelling the trip several times. My Mom had tolerated the treatments well up to that point and forbade me to cancel on account of her battle to wellness. The few friends a family, I'd shared my travel plans with rallied and made me feel like this solo journey was so monumental that I had to go. So I enlisted their help as caregivers for Mom in my absence. I am humbled and ever grateful to each of them now. On October 12th, I went into my wrokplace super early then left at noon to begin my vacation without sharing with any of my coworkers the destination ahead. I was traveling alone and 20 years older than the last time I attempted this. I didn't need any more negative or fearful chatter, than I already had going on in my head. I drove to Dulles airport, hopped on an evening flight to Miami and then an overnight flight that arrived in Santiago de Chile enroute to Buenos Aires, Argentina. From DC it's roughly a 12 hr flight not including layovers. I realized I was gonna be okay when I boarded the brand new American Airlines 777 and found my seat - I was smart enough to upgrade to business class for the longest legs (9 hrs) of the trip. I had a big butt seat (adequate for a VBG) and at least a 5 foot allowance in front of my seat which faced the partition that separated me from first class. During my time in BA, I was truly able to relax to enjoy another second Mother’s Day (October 15th) as well as a delightful 8 day Spring Break where I walked, ate, walked, tango’ed, drank, butchered Argentine Spanish trying to get directions, walked some more and got lost. Oh how I love having to find my way in a foreign place, it is one of the truly life affirming experiences for me. And while I may have gotten run over (traffic’s horrific) I knew that in Argentina I would never have to worry about an active shooter incident - yes this actually crossed my mind. Thanks to cell phones I was never really alone if I didnt want to be, there was only a 1 hr time differential so I was able to communicate via FB messenger pretty much with whomever I chose. This year, I'm heading to Bali, Indonesia. No less than 4 folks claimed they'd travel with me this year. One of them, I'm convinced thought I was as dull as stump until she realized that of all the people she works with I am the only American genuinely interested in traveling outside the States and unflappable about doing it alone. However my best bud, Sandy, who loves, loves, loves water and beaches the way I love getting lost and finding my way in foreign places and on international public transportation. We can easily travel solo "together" meeting up for meals and occasional excursions. I'm actually excited about having a travel companion. This trip to Asia will be my 5th continent - the plan is coming to fruition. Additionally,
the last few years I have volunteered for year end projects that involved traveling and was never chosen. Last year though they were literally day trips, I got to visit Rhode Island and Atlanta, GA (two more places i'd never travelled before). It's kinda how they say money breeds money, well I hope travel breeds more travel.


All that said - what do I hope is the future this blog? Mainly that it be a place of inspiration, joy and sharing for travel dreams of women of color (and of a certain age) who realize that while we may have to let some dreams fall by the ways side there are so many more that we still have time and yearning to pursue. Cheers till next post...

Peace and Blessings



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